I was looking back in my blog archives and found this letter to Bluebonnet. The last sentence explicitly says that she would be an only child forever... however I know in my heart that I meant the foreseeable future, for even less than one year later we welcomed Clementine into our family.
I honestly never thought I could love another dog as much as I loved Bluebonnet but I still always wanted another dog because I have a lot of love to give. Regardless of what I thought or felt, I now know that I am able to love another dog with equal sincerity and intensity because I can't imagine not having Clementine in our lives.
I've written before about how I will cuddle with Bluebonnet and tell her the story of the day we picked her up:
"You were so little and it was raining that day so I just put you inside of my raincoat. Can you believe that?! You used to be so little that you could fit inside my raincoat?!"
I never get tired of telling that story over and over. I always hoped that I'd have a story like that with Clementine. Of course I remember the day we picked her up, but it wasn't raining and she didn't even stay in my lap on the ride home, she managed to make her way down to the floorboard of the car and throw up. Ew! That's not a cute story to tell over and over again when you are cuddling. So I decided that I wouldn't force it... one day we'd have a moment and it would be a story that I would repeat while putting my arm across her and tucking it under her belly.
She was sleeping on her side and her ear was covering her entire face. I lifted it up and said "Hi, Clementine!" and put it right back across her face. She starting jerking her head and huffing as if it hadn't been there before. Then she looked right up at me as if she was asking for help to keep her ear off her face and ask "Mommy, why are my ears so big?" Even though I made the question up for her I answered it myself as well "Clemmie, God made your ears that big and I don't know why."
I don't know why but that was a touching moment because I never say things like that, I never give God credit for anything nor do I blame Him for anything. I am not sure if it was a special moment sent to me from an angel or what but I definitely feel like it was meant to happen. Anyway, I'm not running off to mass or anything, I just wanted to share that and let you know that Clementine and I now have our story that I'll tell her over and over again when we cuddle.